Sacrifice!

The ever so important overview:
I did suffer from Fibro, but managed to have it cured "yes I said cured". I had it treated nearly 5 years ago and havent had a flare up (of fibro anyway) since.

I've read books and articles on Fibro, but essentially due to me not ready to throw in the towel I did some of my own research. I researched my own body issues and worked backwards. I should really write a book on it, but dont know that I can truely be bothered.

I got treatment from a ex GP in Auckland who now is a specialist treament physician for toxicity. It was a tough regime, but one I'm ever so grateful I stuck with.

My limitations now are my hip and back. I have had a full hip replacement and over two separate operations a further 2 revisions. My back condition is stenosis which essentially can put me in a wheel chair anytime it feels. But so far I'm still upwards and moving and I'm eternally grateful for that.

My sacrifice: I believe every person with a challenge has made a huges sacrifice in their life. They have had to give up something that was near and dear.

I have a great voice, but cant perform. My back and hip wont allow me to. I couldnt committ to a performance as I could become "unable". Since a child I wanted to be a huge star. I thought I could still have it, so much so that the last 18 months I have spent a huge amount of time getting my voice ready for auditions for XFactor, I even lost over 38kg to help. But, in the last week my hip has decided to loosen and give me a reality check of "what if I won" then what? How do I perform with a loosening hip, how do I move around the stage. I'm already on morphine and severadol- cant take anything stronger.

So, the last few days I have been mourning my loss, and I'm still mourning my loss. I've lost my dream and now I have to find another one. The next closest dream to my heart is writing.

So I'm writing a novel. When I write I dont feel pain, I suppose because my brain is otherwise engaged/distracted. The only other time I dont feel pain is when I sing, but as soon as I move- I lose control of my voice, lose the key and the pitch- no good if I want to be a super star....

I'd love to hear from others about their big sacrifice and how they handled it?